We've heard some interesting names of potential returns for Mike Gonzalez: Adam LaRoche, Melky Cabrera, and so on. In our heart of hearts, though, we all know Dave Littlefield isn't going to get a player like that. After all, when Littlefield ruled the trade market in 2004, holding the only decent starter available (Kris Benson), we read the names of Justin Morneau, Chase Utley, David Wright and Ryan Howard in the papers, but we had to settle for Ty Wigginton, Matt Peterson and Jose Bautista. Littlefield has an established track record of failing to land real talent in trades.

So, inspired by this thread at Primer, I want to know who you think the Pirates will actually get, assuming they trade Gonzalez this offseason. So scour those AAA rosters, inspect the scrubby ends of contending teams' benches, and guess away. Bonus points will be given for especially humorous explanations.