Son, this world is full of dangerous pitchers who don't want the Pirates to score runs.  Someone has to stand at home plate and drive in runs with a bat? Who's gonna' do it? You?  You, Dejan?  Pirates players hold certain terms dear - hits, RBIs, wins/losses - you sabremetricians talk of these things as if their just statistics - a joke!!!  Well if you're not gonna pick up a bat and drive in runs, I prefer that you just say "Thank you!" and be on your way.

Clint Hurdle (and a few more words to get to the new word count limit for a bloody fanpost which is apparently a lot longer than it use to be where I could just type in "Let's go Buc!" and be done with it.  Holy Heck, how many dang words do I need for this bloody fanpost?  Not 145? How bout a few...