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Chris Shelton!

...Just tripled in his first at bat tonight against the Rangers. This is just amazing to watch. He now has five homers, eight extra base hits, and 12 overall hits in his first 17 at bats.

...And a triple in his second at-bat. Wow. I'm watching this at the computer while I do other work. I'm not even sure I'm writing this because Shelton could be doing this for the Bucs right now. I'm writing this because this is really fun to watch.

...And a single in his third at-bat, which will actively hurt his slugging percentage for now.

...He finally makes an out in his fourth at-bat.