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Pirates lose to own Double-A affiliate, which means everything

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USA TODAY Sports

The Pirates lost to the Altoona Curve 8-6, which is super-embarrassing and stuff except that 1) everyone who played in the game is in the Pirates organization; 2) both major-leaguers and minor-leaguers pitched for both teams; and 3) it just doesn't matter in the slightest. Really, who cares. Here's the box score if you really want to ruin your weekend over a meaningless exhibition game.

The picture is of Starling Marte, because he hit a grand slam. I don't have pictures from the game. I'll let you guess why.