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Pirates come back and ... win?

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Rick Osentoski-USA TODAY Sports

Pedro Alvarez and Starling Marte homered in the bottom of the ninth to come back from a 5-3 deficit to defeat the Blue Jays, 6-5.

All the good stuff that happened in the last five minutes took me by surprise. Before that, it was the kind of depressing losing-by-numbers stuff that's characterized these past few weeks -- bad defense (Gaby Sanchez had an error, and Tony Sanchez had a horrible day, being part of three wild pitches), the scattered crowd of Pirates fans at PNC Park getting out-cheered by Blue Jays partisans, and so on. Along the way, Casey Sadler had a good big-league debut, pitching two scoreless innings and striking out two. And the Pirates managed to put together at least some offense, mostly thanks to good hitting from Andrew McCutchen and Neil Walker. In general, though, this game could have happened on Tuesday, or Thursday, or whatever stupid day of the week you came home from your stupid job and fed your stupid kids and whiled away your stupid existence watching your stupid baseball team lose another stupid snoozer of a baseball game.

Until the ninth. The ninth! The Jays were up by two runs. Their lead was insurmountable! The Pirates' offense hadn't knocked in two runners in an inning since the Carter administration! It hadn't hit a two-run homer since 1785! The ninth! Walker led off with a single, and McCutchen followed with a strikeout. And then Pedro Alvarez bashed a huge home run to center. The ninth!

Well ... the ninth. Ike Davis flied out, and then Starling Marte grounded out to shortstop to send the game to extra innings.

[PAUSES]

No! I'm just messing witcha! That's what happens when you don't pay attention! Look sharp! Marte hit a huge drive to center, which cleared the fence for a walk-off win! That's WIN, w-i-n. Win. If you're still confused, I refer you to Webster's:

to achieve victory in a fight, contest, game, etc.

The Pirates won. As in, didn't lose. The winning part lasted less than ten minutes, and if you thought this was going to be a typical Pirates game, you might have missed it. Some days, interesting things happen. Do try to stay awake.